Wild Monogamy

Cultivating Erotic Intimacy to Keep Passion and Desire Alive

Non-Fiction - Relationships
332 Pages
Reviewed on 05/24/2023
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Author Biography

Mali Apple and Joe Dunn are relationship coaches, lovers, and best friends. In their award-winning book "The Soulmate Experience: A Practical Guide to Creating Extraordinary Relationships" and their new book "Wild Monogamy: Cultivating Erotic Intimacy to Keep Passion and Desire Alive," Mali and Joe share revolutionary ideas for creating relationships that are deeply loving, intensely passionate, and profoundly connected.

    Book Review

Reviewed by Dr. Jordan Alexander for Readers' Favorite

I loved every delicious moment of Wild Monogamy: Cultivating Erotic Intimacy to Keep Passion and Desire Alive by Mali Apple and Joe Dunn. As a fifty-something married woman well past the honeymoon phase, I tentatively cracked the cover, apprehensive about the subject of erotic intimacy. I needed something to reignite the spark and it ended up lighting a bonfire beyond my imagination. “We’re still falling in love, we’re still making love, and our sexual connection is as strong as ever.” Authors Apple and Dunn pop into the dialogue to share their own blushingly personal anecdotes alongside client stories that bring relationship research to life. They explain sex as a physical experience, creative adventure, and expression of emotional connection. It is also spiritual, soulful, and can heal. This was not the book I expected. It focuses on respect, feeling secure, and creating a supportive environment for discovery. Sure some of the topics are challenging, but if two people are keen to keep a long-term relationship “compelling, connected, sexy, and fun”, this is the how-to guide.

I particularly found the Intimacy Inquiry enlightening. Readers are guided using a series of questions to have provocative conversations about sometimes taboo subjects aimed to deepen connections with their significant other. The tool delves into beliefs and values that shape our approach to relationships and sexual experiences. Better understanding your starting point across romantic, intimate, and emotional dimensions helps you find the erotic edge that awaits your discovery. You can skip over sections that do not resonate with you, perhaps some fantasies, erotica, or polyamorous arrangements. If you want more support, you can access useful free resources on the website or try ideas from the treasure trove of sexy dinner dates to intimate and erotic encounters. There are plenty of possibilities for adventurous couples to keep their passion within these pages. Each intimate adventure builds mutual support within the relationship and, in so doing, restores connection. Wild Monogamy has no boundaries as readers learn to love outside the lines. Mali Apple and Joe Dunn show how safety and love foundations in a committed relationship help overcome nervousness to venture into your intimate discovery. If you want to keep a long-term relationship sexually satisfying, learn to nurture your passion and your partner with this guide.

Grace Ruhara

Wild Monogamy: Cultivating Erotic Intimacy to Keep Passion and Desire Alive by Mali Apple and Joe Dunn is a self-help book centered on helping couples develop and deepen their erotic connection and intimacy to keep their desire, passion, and pleasure alive. The book provides tips, tools, and alternative techniques that couples can explore during their relationship. Wild Monogamy explores adventures that make intimate life exciting and help couples connect through them. Going on dates, watching movies, communicating openly about lovemaking, exploring new locations and positions, and having a positive attitude toward sexuality are among the approaches suggested by Mali and Joe. They advise readers to support their partners in overcoming their fears, insecurities, and limitations related to their experiences. This will develop the partners’ feelings of happiness, gratitude, and warmth.

Mali Apple and Joe Dunn have discussed the least explored yet most important topic affecting most couples in our society: finding solutions and alternatives in romantic relationships. Wild Monogamy covers a diverse range of orientations since it targets both heterosexual and LGBTQI relationships. The questions provided help readers evaluate themselves to understand their personalities better and improve where needed. The short stories and real examples drawn from people’s relationship experiences will also help readers strengthen their connections with their partners. I recommend this guide to readers who want to take their relationships to a more loving, intimate safe space.

Jamie Michele

Wild Monogamy by Mali Apple and Joe Dunn is a non-fiction guide for readers who are ready to be proactive in “Cultivating Erotic Intimacy to Keep Passion and Desire Alive.” The book is something of a collaborative collection that the authors incorporated within their own expertise and experiences, and the experiences of others, including those that were less than inspiring; a book that thinks outside the box and gets couples to tap into intimacy not just as a vehicle for sex, but for a connection on a deeper level. Broken down into eight distinct and interconnected parts, Apple and Dunn cover topics and offer tips on areas that include, but are by no means limited to, acceptance and 'sex with soul', immersion therapy and mindful sexuality, performance anxiety and jealousy, and age, drugs and the golden rules of engagement.

Wild Monogamy by Mali Apple and Joe Dunn is refreshingly approachable, something I don't usually come across in books that harness the power of togetherness. And by that I mean it pretty much works for anyone and incorporates so much that a reader would be hard-pressed not to find something of value between the covers. Yes, there are some bad puns in there but stay with me. I won't subject you to more of them. Apple and Dunn are profoundly honest in what they share, from using massage not only to relieve stress and tension but as a body exploration tool, to role-playing, such as acting like a puppy. The standout to me was in how to assist a partner in releasing inhibitions and lessening reluctance and hesitation, and the more emotional aspects of getting to a place where everything else begins to fall into place organically. Overall, this is an inclusive and affirming book to elevate both body and soul and reconnect with those we care about, regardless of what time in our life we inhabit.

Asher Syed

In the relationship self-help book Wild Monogamy: Cultivating Erotic Intimacy to Keep Passion and Desire Alive by Mali Apple and Joe Dunn, the approach to invigorating, or reinvigorating, one's love life is not as challenging as one might think. As a starting point, it begins where nearly everything does, and that's with communication. This entails communicating feelings and thoughts, desires and expectations, and an all-around catch-up on the state of a couple's couplehood. Communication encourages connectivity, and connectivity leads to fuller intimacy in the bedroom and outside. Mali and Joe, as they refer to themselves in their book, advise on what those conversations should include. From there, the exploration of intimacy begins with heightening physical experiences that stretch within a person's comfort zone in new and exciting ways for all partners involved.

My e-reader is overwhelmed with bookmarks of sections I'd like to revisit in Wild Monogamy, and that is a good thing because it means that even after decades of marriage there are going to be things a person still has not considered with regard to their intimate relationship. What are your partner's real feelings on your “work wife” or “work husband”? How do you define fidelity? How do you create a zone of safety? Some stuff might have been forgotten as well, so Mali and Joe recommend going back to the beginning, or even earlier before you were a couple. Remembering the thrill of first holding hands, simply making out, and/or, as Mali reveals, thinking back to how one felt in a youthful crush. As the book progresses, more adventurous themes and ideas are given. Wild Monogamy is an all-around great resource for relationships old and new to get that spark back and keep it ignited.