What exactly is networking? The term is both specific and obscure. Does it mean attending parties with other writers, or maybe having lunch together and discussing storylines and character development? Does it mean that you attend functions? What should you wear to these events? Do I take business cards, a list of conversation builders, some jokes maybe? Do I take my manuscript, and try to slip it into someone's briefcase when they are not looking? The questions go on and on, until you are an absolute nervous wreck. So, instead of networking, I prefer to call it relationship building.

Relationships have two main categories and they are shared interests and reciprocity. Relationships are the structure within which we share valuable resources, services and information. Relationships are reciprocal – both parties are mutually advantageous.
Long ago human beings lived in cooperations, and to survive they exchanged goods and services. For a large number of years, people have lived together with a shared economy of resources and services. It's the means by which mankind flourished. Everyone needed one another to survive.

As a writer, you spend hours and days alone, with just your own thoughts and your own ideas for company. It can get very frustrating. The world of literary agencies and publishers seems a place where we are not only unknown, but do not belong. So how do we get invited into this closed and sometimes hostile club?

The saying ‘it's who you know' does not translate into ‘now we have met, here is my manuscript, now help me’. That sentiment is just plain rude in my opinion. That isn’t how you build a good relationship. Think of your professional relationships in the same manner as your personal ones. If a friend asks you for something, you would probably help them, for two reasons usually. It makes you feel good to help a friend and, secondly, you know if you ever need help, your friend will be there for you.
 
Build relationships with other writers.

Go to writing events in your local community.

Always carry a business card.

Converse with individuals – really chat with them.

Enquire whether there is some help you can give to a fellow writer.

Become more acquainted with writers who are on your same level or above.

Consider tutoring an author who is just starting out.

Apply similar relationship building abilities with different authors that you do in your home and your office. Correspondence, collaboration, sharing of assets.

Despite your best intentions, there will always be people who will be happy just to take what they can get from you, but that is okay, just move on. You will meet people that are just not interested or who do not share your interests. Relationships take time and require a lot of patience, but if you are sincere and generous with your own time then good relationships will blossom.

So in summary, good networking is:

To meet like-minded people at events, social media groups or forums, and make yourself known as an authority on your subject.

Think about what you have to offer to the people you meet (not your manuscript).

Have no hidden agenda, just allow time for the relationship to build.

Then repeat and see your group of contacts build.