In a traditional wedding, there’s this famous saying, “Till death to us part,” which of course, places enormous pressure on the marriage to work. Vows like “You’re the apple of my eye” or “You’re the love of my life” get exchanged. You put a ring on your spouse’s finger to signify the strength of the relationship between you both. And even as the wedding comes to an end, you continue to promise each other that you’ll be together no matter what, that even in death, you’ll meet each other in heaven, or some other afterlife. And while the sentiment is incredibly romantic, it’s also very heartbreaking when it doesn’t work.

Heartbreak isn’t a pleasant thing to think about. Most of the time, we don’t want to think about it at all. After all, heartbreak is painful. It’s suffocating, and sometimes it can even lead to anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. Some people fear heartbreak so much, they’ll do anything to avoid it, even stay in situations that might destroy their well-being. This is especially true in literature where, instead of leaving the perceived love of their life, the protagonist will pursue their love interest until an unrealistic happy ending is met, or their hearts are truly broken beyond repair.

One of the most famous examples in fiction is Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet. Neither Romeo nor Juliet wanted to give up being together, despite the fact that people had already died from the two of them just associating together. Their obsession with one other overshadowed their willingness to break up. This could be due to teenage hormones or the fact that they were still so new to love. Either way, they attempted to avoid the inevitable end of their brief romance, and in the most tragic way.

On the other hand, heartbreak doesn’t have to involve romance. It could also involve family and friends. Many poems detail the pain of having to let go of different aspects of their childhood or their faith in the world as they watch the people around them relish their cruelty. This was the basis of Modernism, a literary movement that was characterized by the effects war had on society. Much of the works produced during this time focused on the devaluing of the individual. Many writers believed that, with the seemingly decreasing size of the world, as well as the carnage left behind by the wars, life was growing more and more absurd by the day. This symbolized a sort of intellectual heartbreak, as writers were forced to abandon the innocence of everyday life.

Despite this, heartbreak has a lot of valuable lessons for writers. It shows that, despite all the bad things that happen in a person’s life, they learn from that heartbreak and move on. The characters show that though the world seems to stop at that specific moment, we have to keep going. Many romance novels are centered around this, such as The Fault in Our Stars by John Green or The Infernal Devices by Cassandra Clare. These books teach us how to cope with our losses and that, in the end, all we can do is treasure the moments we had, in spite of our sadness.

Of course, heartbreak can seem like unnecessary baggage in life. Most people would rather choose to be happy rather than sad, laugh rather than cry. Even so, as writers, we need to be aware of the importance when encountering heartbreak. It can, for instance, tell us how destructive a relationship can be, or how toxic our environment is, or how much growing we still need to do. It’s an important foundation for readers and authors alike, one that we do need to value.