Rule 3: Use “Said” Rather Than Any Other Speaker Attribution Tag

You don’t want your story cluttered up with obtrusive attributions, that much is true. When your characters are constantly chortling, retorting, chipping in, exclaiming, and questioning and not actually saying anything, it gets distracting. Your readers will fade out of the story and lose interest in what it’s all about; instead, they understand that you can use a thesaurus and will start looking for the synonyms that you use instead of “said”.

That said, using “said” too often can also be off-putting, especially when used repeatedly on each page. And, if it is not used correctly, it shows you as being an inexperienced writer. For example, “Jane said” is not the same as “said Jane”.

If you want to know how your dialog will read, use the pronoun rather than the name of the character. For example:

“That’s a delicious cake,” Jane said.

“That’s a delicious cake,” she said.

These both make perfect sense but look what happens if you write it the other way around:

“That’s a delicious cake,” said Jane.

“That’s a delicious cake,” said she.

If it isn’t proper to write “said she”, don’t write “said Jane”. Put the name of the speaker before the verb.

Rule 4: Don’t Use Long Speech

On occasion, you learn more about a character by letting them have their say than you do by using sound bites. For example, read this dialog between a son and his stepfather, after the death of his father in Texas.

“You never asked me if I wanted to move to LA. Why not?"

“What is that supposed to mean?”

“After Dad died. We just left and moved to LA. You never asked me if I wanted to move.”

“I just assumed that it would be best for both of us if we moved on and got a little space, and…”

“For both of us?”

“Yes”

“And how do you know what might be best for me?”

“Simon, I …”

“We are meant to be a family and families make decisions about what’s best together. It doesn’t just come from one of us.”

“Listen, I …”

“You dragged me away from my friends. My dad died and you pulled me away from everyone else I knew. I only ever wanted a family; when Mom met you I thought that would happen, I thought I would finally get someone who could teach me, the way mothers are supposed to teach their sons. I wanted someone who would make me sit down and do my homework, who would yell at me if I was late home, tease me about girlfriends, and be there when I decide to get married …”

“I never realized.”

“You never asked.”

When you are trying to determine whether a character should go off into a diatribe, consider this – is that character attempting to say what they have to before they can be interrupted? Also, take the tension buildup into account before the speech. The more pressure there is, the more dramatic it should be.