Writing a sex scene is not easy. Anyone can write about two bodies copulating, but how to execute it in good taste requires skill. Sex sells. It is a biological imperative that evolution designed to feel good to keep us engaging in it—to ensure the continuity of our species. If God did invent sex, imagine the obscene amount of royalties He is receiving. Sex saturates our lives. We can find sex in all facets of art. Some writers depict coitus with unabashed zeal while others treat it with reservation. Whatever the case may be, the writer, at some point, will have to deal with writing sex scenes when his story demands it.

Writing about sex can prove challenging. Whether recreational or romantic, sex is a purely intimate and personal act. Despite liberal attitudes towards the subject, many still consider sex as taboo, and that it is better left discussed in the sanctity of the bedroom. Whether we admit it or not, something about sex will always draw our fancy. A considerable number of erotica writers are capitalizing on our sexual proclivities and are making good money out of it. Erotica takes a huge portion of the reading market and caters mostly to women. Erotica has even crossed with other genres, and this partnership proves lucrative. Erotica, however, is not for everyone. Nevertheless, sex is an effective device in examining modes of feelings in characters. It is a psychological study without going technical.

So if you are going to write about sex, how much of it should go into your fiction? The answer is, it all depends. Consider your genre. Each type of fiction has a different demand when it comes to sex scenes. As a rule, write the sex scene enough to demonstrate the relationship and to push the plot. The tone of your writing voice is another essential component. A transgressive fiction could mean that you have no qualms about using vernacular terms, but the line here blurs since authors of literary fiction dabble with graphic depictions. John Updike is known for his descriptive sex scenes.

Never, ever renege on your sex scenes. If you do this, you are making a false promise that is bound to disappoint your audience. Let us say that you are writing about a man and a woman brought together by circumstances and eventually develop a relationship that starts to build passionate tension. You bring a sex scene in one episode, wherein the man and woman are engaged in flirtations, sweet nothings, and a physical display of affection. After a prolonged period of intimacy, they agree to spend a night together. They get a room—a scene where the man kicks the door shut. You then proceed to the next scene where they are having breakfast.

You just cut corners and cheated your reader. If the writer chooses to write about sexual tension long enough for the reader to anticipate lovemaking, it is the writer’s responsibility to follow through with what he promised. Write about the sex scenes enough to establish the consummation of two souls--how it will lead to emotional changes between them. The writer is not feeding reader voyeurism, but rather setting a new stage in the relationship between the characters.