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Reviewed by Asher Syed for Readers' Favorite
In No Name Bastard, Tori DaCosta talks about how a person learns compliance long before understanding choice, and how that habit endures across a lifetime. DaCosta traces a pattern that begins with a childhood injury caused by proceeding despite doubt, and how similar moments recur in adulthood, particularly in work, family, and intimate relationships. DaCosta leans into how decisions are shaped by timing, silence, expectation, and perceived obligation, showing how small pauses or failures to pause can redirect outcomes. Through her experiences, DaCosta documents how awareness of that internal moment alters behavior, communication, and responsibility over time, speaking on decision-making as a learned process that can be interrupted and retrained, offering readers a way of seeing that knowing when to stop is as consequential as knowing when to act.
Tori DaCosta’s No Name Bastard is a self-help memoir rooted in real-life experience, and there's no question about why this book is timely right now. Many people have been conditioned to carry blame that never belonged to them. DaCosta walks readers through how that pattern is built one decision at a time at home, at work, and inside systems that hold power. She writes in plain language and gives readers things they can actually do, like choosing silence to stop being cornered in conversations or naming a line the moment behavior crosses it. This isn’t guesswork. The guidance is backed by careful documentation, including encounters with medical institutions and government agencies that show how authority behaves in real situations. This book is for adults and older teens who feel stretched thin by expectations and want practical ways to take responsibility for themselves and put it where it belongs.
