Little Girl Crying

My life-long struggle with anorexia nervosa and the prayer that saved my life

Christian - Non-Fiction
478 Pages
Reviewed on 01/29/2019
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Author Biography

Belinda Rose is an inspirational author, poet, lyricist, blogger and visual artist. She is the author of the vibrant online prayer community, Illustrated Devotions; a healing and prayer ministry where she shares daily prayer, devotions, and offers intercessory prayer for those in need. Through her ministry she seeks to inspire and encourage the broken and suffering, in particular those suffering from emotional/mental disorders and abuse by ultimately leading them into a deeper intimacy with God through prayer. As a Christian Contemplative, she believes it is resting in God in the silence - the journey within - where God's divine action works within us to allow true healing of the wounded heart, mind and soul to occur.

Belinda Rose is devoted her Catholic faith, the Sacred Heart of Jesus and Eucharistic Adoration. She loves spending quiet time in nature and adores animals of every kind. Born and raised in the Midwest, she still resides there along with her husband and three sons. Together they enjoy the companionship of their five Cocker Spaniels, three cats and Buster the Parrot.

    Book Review

Reviewed by Ruffina Oserio for Readers' Favorite

Little Girl Crying by Belinda Rose is a poignant memoir that follows the pain of the author and her journey towards healing. Hurt deeply and abused at home as a child, bullied in school, and raped by someone she loved and trusted, Belinda found herself pushed to the limit, shutting out the pain in her heart, something that slowly morphed into anorexia nervosa and depression. For many years, her self-esteem was almost shattered and she found herself doing things that would eventually hurt her even more. Her eating disorder became an instrument of self-destruction and left great spiritual, physical, and mental repercussions. In this book, she shares the secrets of how she finally gained inner freedom, beat death and depression, and found a reason to live.

Belinda Rose’s book is a gift for readers who have suffered abuse in any form and those who have lost their sense of dignity due to what others have made them suffer. In this book, she teaches meaningful lessons to readers, including the strength of faith — in God and in self — and how to transition from suicidal thoughts to a healthy experience of self-love. I have always had respect for people who have the courage to look straight into their wounds, but when someone strips their soul before readers, it is an act of courage that can’t be ignored, and Belinda Rose has shown in this writing that she has that courage. She shares a message of hope in a language that is accessible. Little Girl Crying might be the story of one woman, but it reflects the pain that is buried in many souls that suffer in silence. This book will not only encourage readers who have been hurt and abused to embrace healing, but will show them how not to hold themselves responsible for the crimes of others. I just loved it; the book is inspiring and filled with insight.

K.C. Finn

Little Girl Crying is a combination of non fiction faith writing and true life story penned by author Belinda Rose, self-tagged: ‘My life-long struggle with anorexia nervosa and the prayer that saved my life’. Written in the form of an enhanced memoir, the volume contains personal poetry, illustrations and Bible verses which accompany the writing to tell Belinda’s harrowing story of a life lived suffering with anorexia and depression. Abused and bullied as a young person, Belinda turned to self hatred and an eating disorder through severe depression, suffering for 38 years before the voice of God gave her a lifesaving realization that finally allowed her to recover. Overall, it makes for an inspirational read of faith over suffering.

Coming from a time when anorexia was a less well-known condition, author Belinda Rose makes it clear that she was at a point beyond human help for the worst parts of her suffering. Her descriptions of her hospitalization are highly emotive reading, and I believe that knowing the story comes from a place of recovery from the start really helps readers to deal with the hardest realities of the work. Belinda Rose writes well and with great enthusiasm for her faith and her new life, offering hope and help through the great inclusions and reflections added to the text of her memoir. I particularly enjoyed her poetry, sometimes bittersweet and sometimes inspirational, but always moving. Overall, Little Girl Crying is a superb memoir that any fan of harrowing inspirational stories will find powerful and uplifting.

Divine Zape

Little Girl Crying by Belinda Rose is a gripping tale of abuse and one woman’s struggle with anorexia nervosa and the prayer that saved her life. Bullied at school, abused at home, and raped by someone she absolutely trusted, little Belinda found her world crumbling, and for almost four decades she found herself torn between destroying her life and fighting for survival. Her disdain for life led to an eating disorder that seemed incurable, but how she redeemed herself is the story that will inspire many readers.

It takes a lot of courage to tell a story like this one and Belinda Rose has more than that courage. In her memoir, she shares a message that millions of women, abused daily, will want to share. Little Girl Crying will bring tears to your eyes and move you to feel the plight of the author. Belinda Rose explores different layers of the story — emotional, spiritual, and psychological. I love the way she writes about her spiritual connection, which is one of the major factors that led to her healing. Themes of spirituality, family, and social issues are skillfully explored in this narrative.

Belinda Rose writes with grace and simplicity and in a voice that will undoubtedly arrest the attention of readers. While the book explores the deep pain resulting from abuse, it also shows readers that they can overcome complex problems and learn to see themselves not from the eyes of those who hurt them, but from their relationship with someone who loves them just as they are. It is a moving story with powerful lessons of survival and healing.

Rebecca Parsons

The writing is superb. The story raw and genuine. To do a review justice, I have been searching for the words to put down about my experience reading Belinda Rose's Little Girl Crying. I think that is it just that...my experience. No fancy adjectives or descriptive phrases, just feeling the experience of reading and sharing a journey with a fellow sister of brokenness. Page after page, through the pain, the prayers, the images...I was drawn deeper into a connection with her. Although our reasons for pain are different, the journey is the same. So I say it is a must read for anyone wanting to find a path to healing. You learn that the path is neither straight nor easy. It takes time to trust, forgive, and learn to pray meditatively. Belinda provides a guide. My favorite quote: "Come to Him, and simply love Him, as He loves you! In the sacred space within, in the little Heaven of your soul, the Creator of the Heavens and the Earth abides. Seek Him there..." The prayer that saved Belinda's life might be the prayer we all need today.

MRM

Belinda's sharing of her life is truly a retreat, a challenge to anyone who reads it, to return to the depths of their own soul. It is a testimony of how one , in spite of the unimaginable events of life, can continue to hang on to glimmers of hope . Her relation with the Holy is awe inspiring and evoked a real "Holy jealousy" on my part.

Father James Kubicki, S.J

When I was given a copy of the book "Little Girl Crying" by Belinda Rose I was intimidated. Not by the subject: anorexia nervosa and how the author came to complete healing through prayer. I was intimidated by its length. I wondered how I could squeeze in the time for this large book in the midst of my busy life. I can honestly report that finding time was not a problem. This book reads like a thriller but instead of "who done it?" the question in this fast-paced account of the causes and the struggle of anorexia is "how will she ever come out of it?" In the course of 450 pages I came to a better understanding of anorexia and more. Let me highlight three other lessons that can be learned by reading "Little Girl Crying."

First, the struggle with anorexia nervosa is a paradigm for all human struggle. Deep down, in every human being, there is a hunger, a hunger to be loved, a longing to know that one is lovable. Human loves can satisfy that hunger for a while but they do not ultimately fulfill us, for, as St. Augustine wrote: "You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our hearts are restless until they rest in you." We are made with a hunger for an infinite love that no finite, human love can satisfy. Only God's love can because God is an infinite love by nature. Until the author discovered this truth through contemplative prayer she continued a self-destructive cycle of binge eating and purging, always convinced that she was fat and unlovable even at 70 lbs.! Whatever one does or does not do to fill the hunger for God will fail unless God is the object of one's desire.

Secondly, I was reminded of another book, "Legacy of the Heart: The Spiritual Advantages of a Painful Childhood" by Wayne Muller. As a drought forces the roots of a tree to go deeper or the tree will die, so the struggles of childhood can lead one to sink deeper roots. Deeper into what? One's relationship with God, certainly, but also into one's relationships with others. Belinda Rose's struggles ultimately led her into deeper relationships with her three sons, her mother, and others who struggled with psychological illnesses. From deep pain can come, with God's saving grace, greater compassion and more joy, so much so that Rose can say, like many in 12 Step Recovery Programs, she is ultimately grateful for how her disease led her to these deeper relationships.

Thirdly, one of the key elements of healing is forgiveness. Past hurts can leave one bitter. But bitter unforgiveness and resentment are the fuel that drives the engine of addictions and anorexia. When it is not dealt with, emotional hurt festers and grows, morphing into an anger which, for those who feel vulnerable and helpless, is turned in on itself. It's been said that resentment is like drinking from a bottle of poison and hoping that the person who hurt us will die. As she began to deal with the painful memories that stoked her disease, Rose developed empathy. A key moment came when she began to understand what led her father to hurt her as he had done. She learned the truth that "hurt people hurt people." She prayed and forgave and healed. In time she learned to imitate Jesus in his redemptive suffering. Jesus--totally innocent--was hurt and abused. He suffered terribly but offered his suffering as a powerful prayer to the Father and saved the world. Rose learned to use her sufferings for others as Jesus did.

I highly recommend "Little Girl Crying" in order to understand anorexia nervosa and so much more. Its lessons are universal, for hurt and the need for healing--both individually and globally--are universal. -- Father James Kubicki, S.J. Former national director of The Apostleship of Prayer, author of A Heart On Fire: Rediscovering Devotion to the Sacred Heart of Jesus

Father Richard Rohr, OFM

"Contemplative prayer is a journey into the heart of God, where we find true healing from the pain, trauma, and wounds of our lifetime. That is the essence of Little Girl Crying. Belinda Rose gives testimony with her life story to the work of divine love, mercy, and amazing grace, and to the power of contemplative prayer to transform, restore, and even resurrect the most broken of lives. A compelling and inspirational memoir, Little Girl Crying offers hope for a suffering world." -- Fr. Richard Rohr, OFM, Center for Action and Contemplation, author of Falling Upward and Immortal Diamond

Janice Morgante

"Belinda Rose takes us on a powerful journey as she travels a tortured path toward healing and transformation going through the pain of trauma and abuse to discover the experience of ultimate love. A modern Pilgrim's Progress." -- Janice Morgante, Executive Director, Riverwalk Eating Disorders and Wellness Centres, riverwalkwellness.ca

Gail McMeekin

"Little Girl Crying is an unforgettable memoir of hope and great faith. It is impossible to put down and the compelling writing takes you deeper and deeper into Belinda's heart, and her quest to find solace and comfort in contemplative spiritual life-saving messages. This book will enlighten everyone who reads it as it is a story of great courage and potent miracles. It is not just a portrayal of a woman with an eating disorder but an inspirational journey for everyone who encounters human suffering and seeks to be healed. This book will help millions of lost souls become whole again." - Gail McMeekin, LICSW, Creative Success LLC, author of The 12 Secrets of Highly Creative Women

Bud Macfarlane

"Belinda's trials of unspeakable darkness and triumphs of ineffable grace will inspire you. Please read this book." -- Bud Macfarlane, President, The Mary Foundation

Janet Conner

For those of us who look to contemplative prayer for comfort and healing, former anorexia nervosa sufferer Belinda Rose shares a lifetime of heartbreaking traumas and offers a startling testimony to grace beyond our understanding." --Janet Conner, author of the bestselling Writing Down Your Soul

Patti Pierce

Having known people with eating disorders, when I saw the opportunity arise to review this book I knew I wanted to read it. It addresses some really tough issues in a way that both brings them to life and challenged the way I thought about certain things. Everyone desires to be loved, heard and understood. I know I definitely feel that way. The story reflects how we can find miracles all around us if we just take the time to look. Everyone can benefit from reading this book and then sharing it with those you love. She illustrates how healing comes through faith.

As she wrote about attempting to take her own life, I found myself fixated on a time in college when a friend of a friend attempted suicide. It devastates me to think someone would feel so alone that he/she decides taking his/her own life is the only solution. I also loved how each chapter and section began with a passage of Scripture. More importantly, it touched my soul how the Scriptures related so well to the topic for that chapter.

So if you are the victim of abuse, had thoughts of suicide or been bullied, or even know someone who has, check out this book for yourself.

Kekg

Belinda's story is one of hope and understanding of the struggles not only of anorexia but struggles that we all can relate to of being understood, loved, and heard. Belinda's story connected to aspects of myself that were different in outward appearances but the same core feeling. Her story touches you and helps to heal you. I would recommend this for everyone to read and share it with your friends and loved ones. It isn't another story about struggle, but instead of hope and the miracles that are available to each and everyone of us. It teaches, inspires, and most of all loves each and every part of us through our own life's journey as you walk with Belinda through hers. I would give this more than 5 stars if I could.

Stephanie

This is an amazing story, an amazingly brave woman was strong enough to share with the world .

Carol

Thank you Belinda for sharing such an important and thought provoking story on healing from within thru faith and the power of prayer. Anyone who is suffering, or knows someone who suffers from an eating disorder, should read this book because it provides deeper understanding of the physical and mental struggles of those who suffer from eating disorders. Your story gives hope for recovery from eating disorders which are often misunderstood by family, caregivers and medical professionals. Thank you again for sharing such an inspirational faith journey.

Genny Boehmer

“Little Girl Crying” is a testament to the strength and courage of the human spirit, and to Belinda’s in particular. It is a stunning example of the power and extraordinary faithfulness and unconditional love of our Heavenly Father.
I was moved to tears and compassion over and over as I witnessed Belinda’s fierce struggle, but more than that, I was moved to admiration and respect.
This is the story of a battle between life and death, of an inner war between the Holy Spirit and the Voice of E.D. It is the story of how this enemy was vanquished through persistence, grace and contemplative prayer.
I believe that what God wants from us more than anything else is our hearts. Belinda’s honest, heartfelt, beautiful prayers and poems inspired and amazed me. They touched my soul and led me into my own prayer.
I recommend this book to anyone who has ever struggled with any addiction and is in need of hope.

Patti Kehoe

Little Girl Crying is truly heartbreaking and moving as Belinda painstakingly opens up her wounds and lets the reader feel the terrible pain of indifference and abuse and the ever-present evil distorted voice of anorexia . I felt myself under the bed with little Belinda and hugging her all throughout each shattering event in her life. I was inspired by her Faith, her ability to forgive, and her trust, hope, and personal relationship with Our Lord. May God Bless you, Belinda. I hope your book brings others suffering in darkness to God's Grace and Healing.

Fr. Don

I believe that each of us is called to let God's Word become Flesh in us. That includes Living, Dying and Rising. This book gives words to the lived experiences of one who has allowed God's Word to become Flesh in her. Thanks for reminding me of Hope, the Power of Prayer and the Faithfulness of God.