Quest for the Holey Snail

Fiction - Time Travel
393 Pages
Reviewed on 05/02/2023
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Author Biography

‘You’ll have to write an author biography of course.’
‘Oh? Why?’
‘Because people will want to know something about you before they splash out on buying one of your books.’
‘You think so, do you?’
‘Just do it, okay?’
‘So what do I tell them?’
‘For a start, you should mention that you’ve written four plays that were professionally produced and toured throughout the UK.’
‘Should I say anything about all the temp jobs I had, like working in the towels and linens stockroom at Debenhams or as a fitter’s mate in a perfume factory?’
‘No, definitely not.’
‘Motorcycle dispatch rider?’
‘You were sacked, weren’t you?’
‘Boss said he could get a truck there quicker.’
‘Leave it out then, but make sure they know that you’ve written six books besides “Quest for the Holey Snail”, and don’t forget to put in something that shows you’re vaguely human.’
‘You mean this kind of thing: “I’m currently in Greece with my wife, Penny, three cats and three rescue dogs and working on a new novel and a couple of screenplays”.’
‘It’ll have to do, I suppose, and then finish off with your website and social media stuff.’
‘Oh, okay then.’
• Website at
• @RobJohnson999 on Twitter
• Facebook author page at

    Book Review

Reviewed by Olga Markova for Readers' Favorite

Quest for The Holey Snail by Rob Johnson is a brilliant fantasy glittering with hilarious humor. Horace Tweed lives with his Staffordshire Bull Terrier Zoot in a flat on Mortuary Street. In response to his advert in Practical Adventuring seeking “gainful employment of an adventurous nature,” Horace gets an offer to find a centuries-extinct snail with hundreds of holes in the shell on a remarkable property of interest to Horace’s employer. As Horace and his co-adventurers, who notably include colander-wearing Zoot, embark in the time machine, DCI Harper Collins, with gluttonous DS Scatterthwaite, are investigating mysterious murders with victims decorated by biblical symbols and snails fitting the description of those sought by Horace. But will Horace and DCI Harper Collins succeed in their quests?

Quest for The Holey Snail was my first meet-and-greet with Rob Johnson’s novels. I found this one remarkable for its generously abundant next-to-none humor. I loved it at least as much as Robert Rankin’s The Hollow Chocolate Bunnies of the Apocalypse. Johnson’s unique humor kept me initially chuckling until it got me laughing to tears at the hilarious characters and their adventures. And humor apart, the tale has everything a fan of fantasy may wish for; a breathtaking supernatural adventure, page-turning suspense, and an intricate plot. Indeed, it left me feeling like I had never lived before reading it!