Welcome to D*ck n B*lls Tower!

Fiction - Humor/Comedy
211 Pages
Reviewed on 12/26/2020
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Author Biography

Jeff Pearson was born in Pembroke, Ontario, Canada, in 1963 and attended Carleton and Lakehead Universities where he mostly majored in Maximum Intoxication / Fiasco Production. Then he went vagabond--rambling / exploring / travelling / working--for years, all over Canada and beyond. For the past twenty years, he has been manning various fire towers deep in the Canadian wilderness. Mr. Pearson's memoir, Miss Nude Canada's Shoes (And Other Fiascos) - Act I * Greenhorn, was a 2020, Readers' Favorite, bronze book award winner in the non-fiction humour category. Jeff has been seriously stoned on ASMR since he stumbled upon it in 2014.

    Book Review

Reviewed by Michael Gardner for Readers' Favorite

How do I describe this absolute madness? As I scratch my head and look for the answer, it’s plain as day in the title of the book, like author Jeff Pearson is giving me a smirk and a wink as the penny drops: Welcome to D*ck n B*lls Tower! Indeed, welcome to a madcap romp delivered as a first-person stream of consciousness adventure with Tony Butterworth, a man with more problems than I can fit in this review without blowing the word count in spectacular style. If I had to summarize this cocktail of insanity, I’d say get a tall glass, add one shot of Terry Pratchett, a healthy measure of Hunter S. Thompson, top up with some Jim Jefferies and garnish with one of those special mushrooms people aren’t supposed to eat (the mushroom is optional). Y’know, ‘quirky’ et al just doesn’t do justice to the complex chaos that is Jeff Pearson’s writing style.

You’ll need to adjust your synapses for this adventure to keep pace with the frantic narrative flow. What appears to be Tony’s journal of manic ramblings is actually a densely packed story, with seething social commentary interspersed with a roller-coaster of riffs on popular culture covering everything from Arnie to Zen. While the prose is overtly in-your-face (Tony is trying to cut down on swearing), the subtext is subtle, asking you to remain alert for the amusing breadcrumbs scattered throughout. While there are plenty of laugh out loud moments, there are lots of wry chuckles and “I see what you did there, Jeff,” moments too. My advice to readers would be: don’t worry about not really knowing what’s going on as you start reading the book. Just go along for the ride. Tony takes care of the rest.

Lesley Jones

In Welcome to D*ck n B*lls Tower! by Jeff Pearson, Tony Butterworth is beginning his six months assignment deep in the forest with only his tormented thoughts and disturbing visions for company. He is there to watch for fires from his Tower. Tony has promised Muffy that he would keep a journal during this time and would note everything he experiences; the good, the bad, and the totally weird. He struggles to cope, to gain a clear perspective on what he encounters; he needs his medication every day and sometimes that is not enough. Tony is continuously pushed and watched by G-Zeus who seems to enjoy his suffering. Why does Mother mock his every action and word? Mother seems to hate Tony's existence and revels in the mind games she plays with him. Through his journal entries, Tony shares his past encounters; some are cherished while others he wishes he could forget.

I immediately loved the character of Tony Butterworth. I was laughing out loud by the first line. The narrative throughout is wonderfully vivid and descriptive. Although Welcome to D*ck n B*lls Tower! is mainly a humorous novel, as you progress through Tony's journal entries you discover a darker side to Tony's personality. His constant negative dialogue is quite destructive to his mental well-being and when you meet Mother and learn of her background, you understand why Tony behaves the way he does. The plot is quirky and completely unique; it is also layered and as the layers are revealed, you get a greater sense of Tony's mindset and mental instability. I absolutely loved the characters throughout; each one was created with incredible thought and detail. I thought the scenes between Tony and Whisper were beautifully written; two lost souls coming together and giving one another comfort and acceptance. There are many disturbing scenes to read, especially the abuse Tony had to endure at the hands of the older bullies. This novel will make you laugh but also shed a tear for a young boy who has to deal with mental illness and memories of an abusive childhood.

Foluso Falaye

In Jeff Pearson's Welcome to D*ck n B*lls Tower!, Tony Butterworth shares his story about his six months of isolation at the fire tower. It involves encounters with wild animals, an embarrassing sexual attraction towards his female supervisor, battling with mental illness, recalling the many hilarious pranks he did with his high school buddy, his strong expressions about faith, his sexual acts and thoughts, and many more strange and comical acts. Tony finds himself unable to avoid being sexually expressive towards his supervisor, which lands him in a situation where he is afraid of being sued and publicly disgraced. Will Tony be able to escape the hole he digs himself into because he can't control his libido?

Welcome to D*ck n B*lls Tower! mixes wit and sarcasm to give readers who enjoy dark humor an experience of great shock and thunderous, tearful laughter. In this comic novel, Jeff Pearson makes use of onomatopoeia, alliteration, metaphors, and other writing styles I don't even think are named yet to create an ingenious and brilliant work of art. If you can get past the vulgar language, offensive opinions about Christianity, and sexual situations, you will discover the beauty in the conscientiously crafted words that make up the book. I learned a lot about forest fires and the different types of smoke to watch out for, climbing modern fire towers, and several other things about working at a fire tower. It is my first time reading a book as hysterical and inventive as D*ck n B*lls Tower! and I won't be forgetting it any time soon.

J. Johnson

I ended up devouring this book in 12 hours. I could not put it down! Hilarious, perverse, angst-ridden, clever and creative.