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Reviewed by Nandita Keshavan for Readers' Favorite
Our Marriage Contract is a an open and honest take on relationships and marriage. Taylor M. Fletcher asserts that being honest about your expectations is much better than struggling in a web of misunderstanding and dashed hopes. In appreciating the core values of kindness and fairness, people can avoid the struggle to control each other via insensitive demands, and instead come to terms with each other's needs and wants in a gradual, understanding way. Through the process of being transparent, honest and accountable, people come to understand the art of compromise and begin to truly make such other happy.
The marriage contract is a written agreement, which is developed by the couple themselves, and they continually update it. It's non binding and non legal and therefore it is intended to be a written record of a couple's agreements. Fletcher recommends that couples should enjoy writing the contract together and be very good listeners, since often insecurities are mixed with needs and expectations and it is important to create an environment of trust to overcome inhibitions which will prevent both people from being honest.
I truly liked the idea of the marriage contract and think that it is a good way of understanding each other well and avoiding arguments. The book is written by a non-counsellor. Taylor M. Fletcher is a “regular guy” who thinks he has hit upon a do-it-yourself approach to relationship therapy. I think being a good listener and thinking about your partner's expectations go a long way to having a solid relationship. Even stronger would be an agreement which is written so that both people will honour it, and strive towards upholding the agreement.
The style of writing is very easy to understand and identify with. The author gives recommendations on building the agreement gradually, to avoid drastic changes in habits in a short amount of time. Finally, it's worth mentioning that the author appreciates the magic of a good relationship and the harmony of good understanding. I highly recommend this book for people who are interested in achieving better communication and understanding in relationships. It's such a great idea that I think people may find the method useful for other types of relationships as well.