Instant Parenting

How to Be a Good Parent and Raise a Child with Fewer Conflicts Instantly!

Non-Fiction - Parenting
83 Pages
Reviewed on 04/25/2016
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Author Biography

"Instant Solutions FOR Instant Problems TO Instant Results"

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    Book Review

Reviewed by Lori A. Moore for Readers' Favorite

Instant Parenting: How to Be a Good Parent and Raise a Child with Fewer Conflicts Instantly! is one of many books in The INSTANT-Series and this one provides the gist of what you need to be good parent. I've often thought that parents should be required to have licenses to raise children and this book is sort of like the study guide to the licensing test. Starting out by explaining a parent's purpose, the book contains chapters including GPS (Guided Parental System), Golden Behaviors of Parenting, Parental Communication Skills, Controlling Yourself Before Controlling Your Child, and several other information-packed chapters.

Instant Parenting: How to Be a Good Parent and Raise a Child with Fewer Conflicts Instantly! starts out with a key concept that I've often believed. A "nice" parent isn't always an "effective" parent. I liked the piece about promoting more open and honest communication with your child. If only every family would practice more communication, most relationships would improve. Instant Parenting is a good reference source both for the new parent or even the parent of a teen who suddenly finds himself not knowing how to handle a situation. The Parental Situational Scenarios and exercises were very helpful and gave good, concrete examples of what to do and not to do. Instant Parenting: How to Be a Good Parent and Raise a Child with Fewer Conflicts Instantly! would make a great gift for a new parent.

C-Five

Instant parenting centers around teaching our children self-control and discipline as they mature into adulthood and the important roles we play as parents. As a mom this book has played a huge part in the way I communicate with my child and the people around me. The more direct and honest I am the more forthcoming and approachable they are. As a single mother of a 6yr old, I found this book to be very helpful and informative. My daughter can be very defiant. Instant parenting points to the areas that I may have gone wrong and the directions needed to correct this pattern.

As parents we often over look the little things our children do, such as making us a card or simply wanting to hold our hands. These are the things Instant Parenting emphasize are very important to our children growth. From a big hug, or a look of appreciation. Simple means of acknowledgement and positive reinforcement goes a long way.

What I ultimately learned from this book is everything that we do as parents plays a major role in the type of adults they become. Instant Parenting ties it all in from the way we interact with our children, to the way we discipline and even the way we reward them for a job well done. I would highly recommend this book to any parent, which is facing a child with disciplinary problem.

Mommy to Grace

This book is a true inspiration, I was feeling completely overwhelmed dealing with my child's behavior. This stemmed from allowing her to get away with everything due to being a toddler. However as she grew the behavior got to the point it was embarrassing I truly needed help. That’s when I spoke to a friend of mine which in turn alerted me to Instant Parenting.

My child is prone to temper tantrums and I just did not know how to cope with this. After reading instant parenting I learned how to remain calm during these fits of rage, find ways to distract her and then allowing her to express her feelings in words rather than an outburst. Words are not enough to explain my appreciation of this book. All I can say is thank you.

vermont reviewer

How to be a good parent and raise a child with fewer conflicts.
Wow too bad this book wasn't written when I was first a parent over 42 years ago. The concepts in this book are wonderful. With great examples. Well written with full understanding about how to be a great parent. From what to do when a child misbehaves in public? To handle communications effectively. I really enjoyed this book and look forward to more in the Instant Series of Books in the near future. You'll want to give this book to your friends and relatives.

This book will certainly help you become the parent that you would like to be. Your children will respect you and you will be able to communicate and set boundaries that will help you both to keep the communication flowing in the right direction. You will also be able to handle your emotions better which will keep your temper and anger under control.

Jenn

Everyone seems to have their own theory about parenting and this book conveys yet another one…in a good way that actually seems to be effective with my kids. The ideas are simple and effective. They build self-esteem and keep the avenues of communication open between parent and child. This book has had an influence in forming my communication style with my children.

Chapters 1 through 3 and 6 teach you how to communicate with and without words and gives you, the parent, exercises to do for practice. It also talks about maintaining your composure and being able to control YOUR emotions first. Before reading this, when my four-year-old would throw a fit, I would do what a lot of parents would do and raised my voice and threaten to lock him in his room. With this book under my belt, I have learned how to make myself take a deep breath, relax, get down on his level to make eye contact and talk to him in a calm but stern voice. IT WORKS!

I really like the ideas given in Chapter 4. It simply states that you should parent like a general at war. You are general; the happenings in your child’s life is the battlefield; and the war is laying the expectations and foundation for your family. The family is the troop and everyone has a specific role in the war and HAS to contribute. You will get respect from your kids by guiding them, providing leadership and giving THEM respect as well.

The last part of the book provides several simple exercises that really make you think about the way you parent and if it’s effective. What needs to be changed? What are you doing right? Start by being a better parent today. One of my favorite lines from the book is “Be the “general” looking out for YOUR troops.” It all makes perfect sense to me!

Deb M.

As mom to two girls spaced seven years apart, with very different personalities, one adopted and one biological, I often face parenting challenges for which I do not feel adequately equipped. Instant Parenting is a short, easy to understand, book that has given me some practical guidelines and tools with which to work. While Chapter 1 helped me to honestly identify my current parenting style, I found the 6 Golden Behaviors To Parenting in Chapter 2 to be insightful and user friendly. In my opinion, Chapter 3 is where “the rubber meets the road” and it is where I had to take stock of my non-verbal cues as relates to parenting my children. My children usually know my state of mind based upon my facial expressions, eye contact and volume level. The exercises in Chapter 3 to teach myself how to control my non-verbal cues were quite difficult, and I’m still not completely in control, but I’ve definitely made progress. What’s interesting to me is that my kids have noticed a difference in how I interact with them and our relationships have begun to improve, ever so slightly.
I had the most difficulty with Chapter 4, as I could not relate to the idea of Parenting Like A General, so I pretty much glossed over it. In Chapters 5 and 6, the focus is on maintaining composure no matter what the challenging issue might be with my child. The idea is to focus on behavior, not character, and to not respond until I have spent time gathering information (by asking open-ended questions, in a neutral, composed manner) to make an informed response. A significant portion of Chapter 6 deals with controlling temper, something with which I struggle. The practical exercises provided, showed me how to reign it in when I am ready to explode – very helpful. The illustrations were good and forced me to think about current issues I am facing, especially with my teenager. The wrap-up in the last two chapters basically reinforced what was spelled out in more detail in the preceding chapters.
Overall, Instant Parenting, is a simplified book on parenting techniques that can truly make a difference in the way in which you parent your children – if applied. I have found, that since working on my composure and non-verbal cues when communicating with my children, we have calmer and healthier interactions – even when they don’t necessarily get their way. For this, I am grateful.

Nicole

I say this book is full of common sense, because it really is. But what I don’t mean is that this stuff is obvious and unusable. It’s the opposite. The author goes through a lot of scenarios which every normal parent can relate to. Child yells at you and misbehaves; you get super angry and yell back. We all snap, but this book walks you through how you should respond, step by step. It may sound obvious once you read this stuff, but it takes a lot of discipline. True to the title you can implement calm discipline techniques and begin understanding your child better instantly, but it will take practice.

Thankfully the book seems to get that; the author is clearly a parent and understands how people’s styles and habits differ. I found that as an avid reader on parenting, some of the things in here I already do, but quite a few were new to me. I’ll have to keep working on some of the techniques, but so far I can see some progress with my 2 and 4 year old.

It didn’t take me long to go through this one either, you can probably read it in an hour or two; the content is concise and skips all the “fluff.” It also doesn’t tell you to go buy anything which is a plus. You can simply follow the behaviors and hopefully connect more with your kid. Every parent wants that I think.

Virginia

Very helpful-

If you think you knew everything about parenting and providing the best education to your children, like I thought, think again. I have been taking care of kids for years now, as the big sister of three , and as a professional care provider; I always applied the same education that I received during my childhood back in Europe.

After reading Instant Parenting, I realized I was wrong for many points, but hopefully not everything. Reading this book comforted me in some of the choices I make daily, and helped me understand what I was doing wrong.

I enjoyed reading every page of the book, it is well written. The author doesn't tell you just how to fix things but also explains why what you are doing is not necessarily right, and explains why his method is the right one.
You will get all the help and advices needed in Instant Parenting.

This book is short and comprehensible, well worth the money it cost. I strongly recommend Instant parenting to all the parents-grand parents- family members and professionals who take care of kids. I already have a friend who bought it and loved it as well.

Corey Beverly

As a mother of two boys, I know all too well that our children's main and first influence is us: their parents. As such, I am constantly looking for ways to improve upon those relationships and ensure that I am the best mother that I can be. Of course, this is oftentimes easier said than done, which is why I purchased Instant Parenting. As opposed to focusing on what's wrong with your child, this book instead addresses what you as a parent can do to improve yourself and, in turn, make for a better relationship with your child. Focus on open, honest communication and setting solid boundaries with your children to encourage and foster a good relationship where they are less likely to rebel. Being available for your children to communicate with you about their emotions and lives will develop trust.

One of the areas in which this book succeeds is offering effective parenting skills from the ground up, including both verbal and action-based skills to develop. One of my boys is a toddler and I can already see these methods affecting both his reactions to me and his behavior around the house and with his brother. He's extremely inquisitive, as is the case with most toddlers. This often leads him into situations that can cause him physical harm so I'll step in to stop him from playing with something sharp or get him off of the furniture so he can't fall and this ALWAYS leads to a temper tantrum. Instant Parenting actually offers some excellent tips to avoiding and discouraging this behavior, such as practicing parental volume and eye contact.

Of course, not every child is going to respond to this type of change; some kids are just difficult. Not to say that they are lost causes necessarily, but it would be unrealistic to think that every parenting principal offered in Instant Parenting will be efficient with every child. However, it's worth the read and the attempt regardless. There are many valuable nuggets peppered throughout the book, like the reminder that our children are fragile little human and that our job is to help foster a healthy sense of self-worth, not to ruin their confidence before they've ever had a chance to truly develop it.

In all, Instant Parenting does a great job at reminding parents that we are thermostats, not thermometers; we set the environment that our children will adapt to and live in. If we want to have the highest likelihood of not only raising well-adjusted, emotionally-stable children, we must first focus on being excellent parents with the mindset of breaking the cycle of ineffective parenting.