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Reviewed by Viga Boland for Readers' Favorite
“Many, many years before,” states Veronica Tanzen in her memoir, LOL: Living Out Loud, “I heard the story of a very spiritual man who counselled a woman I knew on how to find her perfect man. He told her to write down every single thing she wanted in a man, and to pray about it every night. Her list was over two hundred items long and even included obscure things like “must love sushi” and “must love old Western movies.” That woman did meet her soul mate, and he was everything and more.”
Veronica Tanzen created that list too, but when, after ending a second disastrous marriage, she finally plucked up the courage to find husband #3 through online dating sites, it wasn’t until she’d dated a long line of men that she realized how she’d dismissed that list and kept settling for men who came close, BUT! Only on her fifth date with Greg did she find herself mentally putting happy check marks beside all the things she wanted in a husband. She had finally found her soul mate. She’d also found out a lot about herself which she hadn’t really admitted before. And most importantly, she discovered she really is deserving of love, especially her own.
LOL: Living Out Loud is an honest, chatty, often funny book about the pitfalls and joys of online dating after divorce. Oh sure, a reader doesn’t have to have been married before to enjoy this book: the reader only has to be someone thinking about fishing for a partner using the many cyber dating sites currently available. But for the divorced person, of both sexes, this search is far more difficult. Those using this method of finding a life partner are more often than not wanting companionship and, yes, sex, but scared to death of trusting another person because of previous disastrous marriages.
Reading LOL: Living Out Loud was like being given a microscope into my own daughter’s life (and the reason I was interested in reading this book). After two nasty, failed relationships, now a mid-30’s single mom with a teenage daughter, she would dearly love to find a good man “like Dad” as she has often told me. But after one or two dates with fellows she’s been chatting with online who seem to fit her criteria, she can’t tick off enough of those vital check marks. Just as Veronica Tanzen found, so many fellows have trust issues and balk as soon as things seem to be getting serious. They cut and run. They stop texting. Sometimes they resurface a month or two later. And some, like Phil in LOL: Living Out Loud, become permanent long-time friends, but not “the Greg” that each cyber dater is hoping to find.
Like any good memoir should, LOL: Living Out Loud provides hope that there is a happy ending to a struggle. Veronica finds her Greg and assures the reader she/he can too. Veronica Tanzen maintains a blog site where you can listen to an interesting interview with her about her book and her views on what it takes to have a happy marriage. According to Veronica, it takes honesty, humility and humour. As someone who will celebrate 45 years of marriage this year, I couldn’t agree more! And I think Veronica would agree that love can indeed be lovelier the second, even the third time around. Bottom line, don’t be afraid to hunt for your soul mate using online dating sites. Veronica Tanzen prepares you beautifully for what to expect. Read LOL: Living Out Loud, and then start filling out your profile. Your “Greg” is indeed out there somewhere!